Troublesome Topic: THE ONE I LOVE TO ME AND I TO HIM

Lesson 7 of 13

Song of Solomon 2:16

Translation

THE PEACEFUL WOMAN TO THE PEACEFUL MAN

The one I love to me and I to him;

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he grazes

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among the lilies.

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Paraphrase

THE COMPLETE WOMAN TO THE COMPLETE MAN

He cares for my needs and I care for his needs;

I satisfy his needs with my beauty.

A man’s greatest needs in marriage are to be respected and admired; a woman’s deepest needs in marriage are to be treasured and made to feel secure. These needs are so basic and so deep that, if they are not met it is a deep wound. Emerson Eggerichs describes all this very well in his book Love and Respect (Focus on the Family and Integrity Publishers, 2004), and Shaunti Feldhahn does the same in her books For Women Only and For Men Only (Multnomah Books, 2004 & 2006 respectively). In order to meet your spouse’s needs you must understand them, and the keys to that understanding have been in God’s word all along. Caring for one another’s needs is the key to a happy marriage.

The next lesson is: He Grazes among the Lilies

Footnotes

1

This means “The one I love [belongs] to me and I [belong] to him.” She is saying, I know he is totally committed to me and totally available to me because he has given himself to me; likewise, I am totally committed to him and totally available to him because I have given myself to him. In this case she starts with him, and therefore her emphasis is on him and his constant and complete commitment to her. Later in The Song (6:3) she will turn it around and start with herself, emphasizing her loyalty to him.

2

To graze meant to “satisfy one’s basic needs.”

3

Lilies were a splash of beauty.