Troublesome Topic: The Canyon of Lust
Lesson 5 of 6The Christian life is fraught with dangers on all sides. For a man, one of the biggest dangers is lust. It can be helpful to illustrate the danger of lust as a huge canyon located right next to the trail we are hiking on throughout our entire life.
We know that walking close to the edge of the canyon is dangerous, but something inside us wants to get a glimpse of the bottom of the canyon. Yet it seems like we can never see far enough inside it to see the bottom.
However, for a married man there are some lookout points with guardrails that are available frequently along the path.
Previously I tried to walk right on the edge of the canyon, but what happened most of the time was that I would slowly, carefully climb over the edge of the canyon and down just a few feet in my attempt to see the bottom of the gorge. Sometimes I would slip and fall a few feet before catching myself. When that happened, I would realize I was in danger and work to climb out of the gorge to the safety of the trail. But I would only walk a few feet on the trail before I would start looking over the edge of the gorge again. I wanted to live for God and walk along the trail without falling of the cliff, but I also wanted to see what was in the canyon. I wanted two things that were incompatible. Every day there was a tremendous battle going on inside me between the canyon and the trail. Usually the canyon won; by God’s grace it did not swallow me up altogether.
In another lesson I tell my story of what changed my life regarding lust, i.e. the price I had to pay in order for me to finally make the changes I had wanted to make for a long time. See The Three Things that Finally Brought Me Victory Over Lust
Now my life is different. Whereas before my days were characterized by a struggle to walk as close to the canyon as possible without falling in, or by a struggle to climb out of the canyon, now my struggle is different. You see, previously, when I was walking on the trail, I still had my head turned toward the canyon. One of my natural priorities was to satisfy my desire for sexual stimuli, so I would think about lust often. I was never more than a few inches from falling over the edge. Most of the time I was right on the edge or trying to climb back out of the canyon of lust.
Now my purpose is to stay as far away from the edge of the canyon as possible. I walk the trail looking the other way rather than looking toward the canyon. I am aware of the canyon’s presence for in my peripheral vision I can see that the canyon is there, but I no longer focus on it. I don’t keep it in my sights, rather I keep it out of my sight because I consider it a dangerous place.
However, when I come to a safe lookout point with proper guardrails (my marriage), I turn toward the canyon and enjoy its beauty knowing that I will be perfectly safe in doing so. These spots have the most beautiful views anyway. Even though I cannot see all of the river at the bottom of the canyon (all of it represents the full extent of sexual experimentation in all its lascivious forms), I do see parts of the river (sex with my wife), and the experience is amazing, yet there is no danger involved in looking at the canyon from these protected places.
The new me has no clear picture of what the canyon looks like apart from the view from the protected lookout points. I keep my eyes looking at the trail or at the sights on the other side of the trail, not at the canyon. That being said, I can usually see the canyon in my peripheral vision. Not only do I know it is there, it would only take a slight movement of my eyes to purposefully get an eyeful of it. Even without purposefully looking at the canyon, I sometimes unintentionally see more of it than I prefer, but I know, and God knows, that it was not intentional. This may happen when the trail curves and the canyon ends up right in front of me. See my illustration of Watch Out for Magnets!
The canyon of lust will be a constant threat for my entire life simply because I am male, but I need not live in slavery to its alure. I don’t need to see all of the river at the bottom of the canyon. I don’t need to see or experience the depths of the depravity of lust, pornography, lasciviousness, etc. Doing so would do me no good. All I need are the views of the river that God intended for me to see (sex with my wife).
I am here to tell you that it is possible for a man to walk parallel to the dangerous canyon of lust without falling (or climbing) over the edge. When I live this way, I make exponentially more progress along the trail because I am not having to spend my time and effort crawling out of the canyon all the time. What’s more, I get to see the best parts of the canyon from the protected lookout points. Satan plays on my natural desire for sexual stimuli and tells me that I need to see more than what is available from the safe lookout points. But it is a lie. Now that I am looking away from the canyon instead of toward it, I have peace and joy in my life, my needs are satisfied, and I live with purpose.
What about men who have no lookout points (i.e. men who are not yet married, or are widowers or divorced)?
In one way, the canyon of lust presents a greater challenge for the men who do not have the lookout points (a marriage), yet in another way, all men face the same challenge because it is a battle of the mind. A married man can fill his eyes with the sights of the canyon just as easily as a man who is not married. Having a wife does not prevent that from happening because it is a battle of the mind, not a situation determined by one’s setting.
Let’s compare the married man and the unmarried man. By God’s grace it is possible for a married man to live with only one source of sexual stimuli in his life, that being his wife. His memory bank can be filled with images of her alone, or of clear images of his wife and some old, fading images of things he saw before getting out from under the tyranny of lust. Likewise, it is possible for a man who does not have a wife to live without any sexual stimuli at all in his life – at least nothing that can be called to mind with clarity. That seems to be a daunting task and an austere lifestyle, but in the case of a man who is not yet married, think of the exhilarating experience he will have on the night of his wedding! If he has turned from a mind dominated by lust to a mind dominated by glorifying God, he will come to his wedding night with a totally clear conscience and no thoughts or mental images of other women, and thus no possibility of anything that could mar the wedding night experience. He will have zero guilt, only joy. As he moves forward in the process of adjusting to being a married man, his mind and heart will not be pulled two different directions; he will be focused completely on glorifying God through staying free from all sexual stimuli other than his wife.
Just like almost everything else in the life of a Jesus-follower, it is impossible without God’s help and without significant sacrifice on our part, but it is possible.
The next lesson is: Don’t Watch an Arc Welder