Troublesome Topic: Starting a Family

Let me ask you to think about this for a minute before proceeding to read my thoughts.

Ladies, try to imagine having no previous knowledge to help you know what to expect, yet having to deal with monthly periods, pregnancy, childbirth, raising children, and menopause. The unknowns would be myriad. Chavva couldn’t call her OBGYN or even talk to her Mom! What do you think your responses would have been?

One night “The one through whom God gives life” woke up screaming something about blood. “The red man made from dirt” couldn’t understand what she was saying or what the problem was, and he had not yet figured out fire, so he carried her outside into the moonlight. She could tell that he had no idea what was going on so she took his hand and put it between her legs. In that way she showed him that it was indeed blood and that it was coming from that place. Neither one of them knew why this was happening or what to do about it. “The red man made from dirt” tried to calm his wife down until morning came.

By morning he had deduced that this probably had something to do with that stuff “The Lord is Salvation” had told them about her experiencing “hardship and conception, as well as pain in bringing forth children.” So this was probably part of the curse of sin. The question was how to tell “The one through whom God gives life.” But he didn’t have to; she saw it in his face.

After about 6 hours of bleeding said, “Surely this part of the curse won’t last any more than 12 hours.” After 12 hours had passed she said, “Surely it won’t last any longer than 24 hours! After one full day had passed she said, “Sure it won’t last any more than two days.”

We can be confident that, while they were in the “The protected enclosure of delicate delights”, one of two things was happening regarding what we now know as a woman’s monthly cycle. Either there was no such thing because somehow it was not necessary, or she had cycles, but they were not painful like they are for women today. My guess is that it was the latter. The cramps, pain an bleeding which are so common today were changes made to the woman’s body as part of the curse of sin.

At some point “The red man made from dirt” and “The one through whom God gives life” apologized to each other, asked for forgiveness, and agreed to not hold the past against each other. There were additional sacrifices offered to God when the seventh day arrived.

After they got things straightened out with God and with each other, things began to go better for them. It was still tough, but their outlook was better, their teamwork improved exponentially, and they began to get better results for their efforts. After that they always made God an important part of every day, and they resolved problems between the two of them right away – before the sun went down.

At some point “The red man made from dirt” and “The one through whom God gives life” decided that they should not bring children into the world until he had figured out how to feed his family better and make a sturdy shelter and until she had figured out cooking, medicine and making clothes. She agreed, not knowing that it would take about 80 to 90 years for them to get there. But their idea of being “ready” was different than God’s idea. So, if my assumptions are correct, God protected her from getting pregnant until they had learned how to eke out a living from the resistant soil. Thus, two things were involved in causing them to wait so long before having children (about 80 to 90years): Their decision to wait until they had figured out how to survive, and the protection of God because He knew they were not yet ready.

We don’t know how old they were when they decided to try having a family, but it may have been about 80 to 90 some years old. I get this from 130 years (Adam’s age at the birth of Shayth (“Substituted”) minus 9 months of pregnancy, minus some time for mom and dad to mourn the death of Habel (“He has breath from God”), minus about 40 years or more for Qayin (“Acquired from God”) and “He has breath from God” to grow up, develop their specialties and for “Acquired from God” to kill “He has breath from God” and be sent away as punishment.

When “The one through whom God gives life” got pregnant the first time, she thought she knew what to expect because she had observed animals get pregnant and give birth. But when it was her turn to experience pregnancy, she found that – It was terrible! She was sick all the time and her emotions were unpredictable. She did not know if what she was experiencing was normal or if it meant there were problems. But she had no idea what to do about it if there were problems. Neither did she know how long pregnancy would last for her because the gestation for every kind of animal she observed was different. After a couple months she asked, “Is this almost over?”

Then she started getting a belly. It grew and grew. She began to have trouble bending over and finding a comfortable position to sit or lay. She wondered if her belly would ever stop growing. Later she wondered if her belly might pop before that kid came out.

Then there was childbirth. That was a learning curve on a whole new level. She had heard animals cry out in pain on various occasions, and she had watched some animals give birth. While she noticed that the delivery process involved effort and strain, she never heard an animal cry out in pain while giving birth. So she thought, “that shouldn’t be too bad.” Then her labor pains started and she learned a different story. She could not help screaming in pain. Of course, “The red man made from dirt” didn’t know how to help her. She just did what was natural, like pushing, and the child came out OK.

Then there was the decision of what to do with the umbilical cord. They had both seen animals chew it off with their teeth, but for some reason, “The red man made from dirt” decided to cut it with a flint knife instead.

Through several pregnancies “The one through whom God gives life” learned what to expect and taught her daughters what to expect so they would have some knowledge about it, unlike herself.

The business of caring for an infant and raising a child was also fraught with many challenges, as you can imagine. She could not ask herself what her mom would have done in any given situation. At first she did not know how to find a good balance between being protective and being permissive with her children. That is hard for us as well, but she had to figure out what was dangerous for children without the aid of informational resources, a mother and father, or even Google!

“The red man made from dirt” taught his sons how to get from the ground what they needed for life. But he wanted them to prove that they had learned these skills reasonably well before he would grant his permission for them to marry and start having children. He also wanted them to prove they had learned spiritual disciplines, responsibility, leadership, emotional stability, and relational aptitude, before he would grant that permission. The tradition of the father deciding when his son was ready was passed on to each successive generation. If this assumption is true, it means that they all took a long time to learn and perfect the various skills necessary for life, often around 100 years.

The next lesson in this study is Qayin and Habel.