Troublesome Topic: How Close Did Mary Come to Getting Stoned?
Lesson 3 of 14Matthew 1:19
Translation
Moreover, her husband, JOSEPH, being a righteous man, but not willing to expose her publicly, purposed to divorce her secretly.
Go to footnote numberParaphrase
But her husband, THE ONE WHO IS INCREASING, being a righteous man, but not willing to expose her to public disgrace, purposed within himself to divorce her without bringing any charges of wrongdoing against her. (see full comment below.)
The Torah prescribed various regulations about matters involving improper sexual intercourse, however, it also left some situations undefined in order to give the father the freedom to make determinations in those cases. Let’s take a closer look at the details.
Here are the issues involved:
1. Authority – She was betrothed, which means she was still under the authority of her father, and yet partially under the authority of Joseph, who was now considered her husband, even though the marriage had not yet been consummated. It was a type of shared authority but we can be sure that the father held most of it.
2. Virginity – A young girl’s greatest possession was her virginity; thus she was not likely to give it away or throw it away. Later, a married woman’s greatest possession was her ability to have children; that is why women who were barren were seen as having been cursed.
3. Punishment for improper pregnancy – The fact that Mary turned up pregnant meant one of two things in the minds of the people, either Mary had been promiscuous with another man, or Joseph and Mary had engaged in sexual intercourse prior to their wedding.
Deuteronomy 22:20-21 says that, if a husband discovered on their wedding night that the girl he married was not a virgin, and if she could not prove her virginity, she would be stoned in front of her parent’s house. (For the issue of proof of virginity see my lesson called Why Did Some Sexual Acts Receive the Death Penalty?)
The situation in this specific story involved a betrothed girl who got pregnant, so it was assumed that she had engaged in sexual intercourse with someone, right? Because she was betrothed (engaged to be married), having sex with another man was considered adultery which was punishable by death. If the betrothed husband formally accused her of having sexual relations with another man, and if he could convince the town fathers acting as judges that his accusation was valid, she would be stoned. If the man who got her pregnant could be identified in a way that would convince the town fathers, he would be stoned along with the girl. If the other man could not be identified and if the town fathers were convinced it was not the betrothed husband who got her pregnant, the girl would be stoned by herself – in front of her parent’s house!
However, if the betrothed husband did not make such accusations, she would not be stoned. Whether he took her as his wife or did not accept her as his wife was not related to a stoning; the key was weather or not he made a formal accusation against her to the town fathers.
Most of the time, in situations like this one, she was stoned. So as this situation developed, Mary knew that apart from God’s protection over her and her special baby, she likely would have been stoned. God’s protection took the form of Joseph making a very selfless decision.
The initial reason Mary escaped being stoned was because Joseph was willing to take the blame for something he didn’t do and live the rest of his life as a debt-riddled bachelor. That decision was soon to change for “someone” convinced him to marry the girl.
(You can read much more about these issues under Troublesome Topics starting with What Made Sexual Sins Wrong? and continuing from there to other related topics.)
The next lesson in the topic The Birth of Jesus is: What Was the Procedure for Stoning Someone?
Footnotes
1: “divorce her secretly”
In that culture an engagement was serious enough that it required a type of divorce ritual in order to be negated. How could Joseph do this secretly since people knew they were engaged and they could see, or would soon see, that she was pregnant? Besides that, there are no secrets in a small town. What is meant by this statement is that he would not press charges resulting in her being stoned.